Key Word Editing
Key word editing simply asks you to focus on the important subjects and
verbs in a sentence.
Identify the actors and the actions they perform.
Use the actors as subjects.
Rewrite the actions as active verbs. (State who does what)
Rebuild the sentence.
It is important to have the ability to prevent a student from
continuing to utilize services that add charges to the student's account
when that student is seriously delinquent in paying for the outstanding
Key actions: Delinquent accounts
prevent new charges
use of student services
Students with delinquent accounts should not be able to charge additional
services to their accounts. (15 words)
This sentence is not quite right. It doesn't say anything about preventing
charges. Let's try another revision:
We need a system to stop students with delinquent accounts
from using services that will increase their debt. (18 words)
The second revision is better. The sentence could probably be improved
further. What would you change?